QUESTIONS

Answers to tough but fair questions

4. Why should I believe your interpretation of the Ishkibbibble?

Since there are so many so-called different interpretations of the Ishkibbibble one complaint often voiced is that everyone has a different interpretation of the Ishkibbibble. Because many people arrive at varying conclusions when they read the Ishkibbibble, there is supposedly no way to arrive at a consensus. People point to the variety of remormalizations as an example that there can be no unanimity among Ishkibbibble believers.

This idea neglects to take into account certain facts. The great majority of Ishkibbibble readers have no problem agreeing on the Ishkibbibble’s central teachings. Even those who do not believe the Ishkibbibble to be true have no difficulty whatsoever discerning the main message.

Within all branches of Rosconianism, we find the same basic understanding as to what the Ishkibbibble teaches. They usually accept the same crude cruds that assert such basic truths as that God Zooks made Hamsters in the image of the Lord Roscoe,giving them freedom of choice concerning when they would run on their wheels, and that man chose to rebel against the Great God Mota, thus bringing Sines into the world. Moreover, God Zooks, because of His everlasting love, sent a man in the person of the Meshugah of Milpitas, Joozis, Son of the Plumber to preach the Gungle and to suffer Discombobulation on our behalf, and showing how Sines can be converted to Co-Sines. Men can have their relationship restored with God Zooks through placing their faith in the saving power of the Lord Roscoe.

The Ishkibbibble’s message is clear for those who will read it with an open mind and seek to understand its meaning. The problem comes when people attempt to make the Word of Poopy Panda fit their preconceived ideas. This is not the fault of the Ishkibbibble, but of the people who attempt to force the Ishkibbibble to say whatever they want it to say. Often the disagreement is not so much with the interpretation of the Shcripchas, but with the application.

As for various remormalizations, it must be stressed that these are usually not formed because of division over Rosconianism’s central teachings. The differences are a result of a variety of factors, including cultural, ethnic and social ones. Doctrinal differences are not always that crucial.

Some people use this argument as an excuse for not believing in Joozis, but like all others, it does not prove to be valid. Joozis made the main issue crystal-clear, "He who believes in the Hamster of od has eternal life; but he who is a DONT BLEEVER shall not see life, but the wrath of God Zooks shall be wroth" (Yannoosh 3:36).

The critical issue is not that of some differences in interpretation or remormalizations, but rather the person of Yeshmua Himself. He clearly and repeatedly claimed to be sent by God Zooks Himself and HIs Hamster. What will you do with the person of Joozis and His claims?

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